Tuesday, October 10, 2017


The most humorous and the least likely to succeed they said,
As they voted, huddled together, in Larkspur;
Like conspirators defining the lines on my palm.
I stand here looking back at the blur,
The blur my life may have been;
And all I can do is think to myself, did I make her laugh enough?

Plump, alone and craving her smile,
I put on a voice, a funny one I’d like to think,
And looked her way, did I make her laugh at all?
I put on another voice and another and another.
That is where it all started,
No, not in Larkspur- it began my dear
In my very own Windy City, decades back.

Computer games and video games,
They came and they went;
The voices, they grew;
They grew every day, in numbers
And in tone.

One little spark of madness, a gift I treasured,
Was it really the source of all the gladness?
Or was it what spread in to darkness?
One little spark of madness, I wouldn’t lose it,
This I said to myself, I’ll admit.

Between “The World According to Garp” and “Mork and Mindy”
I had to say goodbye to my good friend… John
At Chateau Marmont Hotel in Angeltown.
As I made you laugh and drew you in to the center of
The narratives of “Patch Adams” and “Bicentennial Man”
I had to lend my voice for “Blame Canada” for a missing Mary.

One little spark of madness, a gift or a curse?
One little spark of madness, I wouldn’t lose it,
This I said to myself, I’ll admit.

The world seems dark,
But I will fight it out.
Yes, I think I will.
The voices grow, louder and louder;
Fighting loud whispers and strange tongues
All I can do is think to myself, did I make her laugh enough?
Did I make you laugh enough?

  1. The reference to John is John Belushi (Robin Williams and Robert De Niro were the last stars to see John Belushi alive, albeit on separate visits to Bungalow #3 of the Chateau Marmont Hotel in Los Angeles on the day Belushi died of a drug overdose in March 1982.)
  2. Mary refers to Mary Kay Bergman. When "Blame Canada", a song from South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999), was nominated for a Best Song Academy Award, it was Robin Williams who performed the song at the ceremony because the actress who sang the song in the film, Mary Kay Bergman, had committed suicide a few months prior to the awards show.

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

The Stirrings of an Ineffable Soul

She closed her eyes,
As she felt every part of her being
Immersed in a consciousness, alien to her.
The voices in her head, faint whispers
To begin with, rose to a cacophony,
As the consciousness reached
A crescendo of its own!

Suddenly, it was all over;
She could hear the crash of silence
Against her pining soul.
A silence so loud, she wished
For the cacophony of the voices
In her head again.
Unknown to her, every bit of her soul
Transformed, mutated and altered
To soak in the silence,
Silently creating a sound of its own.

Exhausted, she lay, waiting
Patiently, for the pain,
The angst and the clarity
Of the unknown.
She relinquished her ego;
She relinquished her name;
She welcomed the unknown
With open arms and
Closed eyes.

In darkness of the sun,
It crept up on her,
Shrouding her being,
Purifying her soul,
Lightening her mind,
Brightening her body, and
Freeing her dreams;
Until all there was left
Was a single unity;
An unknown one.

There was no her;
There was no soul;
There was no light;
There was no pain;
There was only
The pureness of being.